Dear Daughter,*

You are at the time in your life where you are exploring what you believe, piecing your world together as it expands and grows.

My precious daughter, ever since you were born, we aspired to teach you many things so you could grow into your full, beautiful self as a child of God. In some areas we succeeded and, in others, we missed the mark. I am sorry. I seek your forgiveness and I am trusting God to cover my failures.

I just want you to know while you launch into adulthood at this unstable time in the history of our country, and, by extension, the world, that the choices are not what you think they are. It may look like there are two paths in front of you: one involves sticking with Christianity and buying into things that seem wrong, and the other involves taking the values of Christianity and turning away to do what is right. Even so, there is a somewhat hidden path if you choose to seek it. It is going to be increasingly hard for young women like you to see it and hear it because of the forces obscuring it, but it is the truth that we have most wanted you to know. It is the path of Christ. I understand why you do not want anything to do with what you see around you, but what you see is not who he is.

Since humankind was created, God’s disposition toward his children was not to force them into loving him. We have always had a choice. This tells us something about how God uses his power. He wants relationship and not dictatorship. So when he sent his son Jesus into the world as God in the flesh, it is no wonder that Jesus abided by the same standards. The Bible tells us that Jesus had all the powers of God available to him, but he did not use them to coerce people to follow him, glorify himself through show, or overturn oppressive empire.

Of all the ways that God could choose to come to earth, he sent Jesus as a simple boy born to a no-name family, who grew up to be an offbeat Jewish rabbi with great compassion, supernatural authority, and divine insight. Instead of instigating a bloody revolution or demanding allegiance to himself, he taught the secret of the kingdom, which required people to draw near with openness and curiosity in order to behold that which is hard to see. He preached that happiness came through meekness, peace, righteousness, and suffering for God. He drew from a deep well of truth that was other worldly, but he walked in the nitty gritty of the world, touching untouchable lepers, the bleeding, dead, and demonized people.

Christ’s most powerful action was his unjust death at the cross, which he willingly submitted himself to without a fight. Because of his sacrifice and his resurrection, death in this world is life in the next. None of his followers had to fear death when they were martyred by earthly powers. After Christ, no king could terrify Christ-followers because they lived unto a heavenly kingdom rather than waiting for an earthly one.

You told us the other day you passed someone on campus who was yelling about salvation with big giant signs and you argued with them. You may not be following Jesus yet with your life yet, but you know him. You know the kind of person he is. You can identify fruitless things done in his name and the kinds of things that represent his character.

What concerns me is that culture is splitting things in a way that makes you think you have to choose. You do not need to choose between forceful governmental Christianity and a Christ-less path. You can cling to the true Christ and his ways in the midst of this broken world.

Your dad and I have watched generations of students deconstruct the parts of cultural Christianity that are off track, but it has broken our hearts when they lose their desire to connect with Christ altogether. My prayer for you and all our students and friends is that Christ will not be lost in the midst of this culture war. At least my confidence is in this–even if you lose him, he will not lose you.

What I am trying to say is that the forces making choices today in our world in the name of Christ are not necessarily representing Christ. Christianity means to follow Christ and Christ did not assume a position of controlling the government for greater influence or usurping government powers. Christ led the way for us to follow, despite these systems. His very being goes against all systems of earthly power and control. The greatest resistance to all forms of evil was laying down his life.

So, please, don’t think you have to reject Christ because of the mislabeling happening in society right now. Christian Nationalism is a co-opting of the symbols of Christ for national power and domination, two things Christ had no interest in. Christ is still the most powerful antidote to all the powers of darkness in this world. He disarms them through his refusal to wield power the way institutions and leaders are tempted to.

So Christ is for you, not only because you are a young woman and the gospels show us so many cultural and religious-upset moments where he crossed barriers to give women dignity and honor, but because history will show that the powerful cannot advance Christ’s cause in the way that the meek can. Your instincts are correct. The trick is to resist using earthly powers to counter the ones you face in your generation.

In seminary, I learned some things of particular importance now.

Weak Vessels Can Display Christ’s Power

The way Jesus came into and left the earth is just as important as who he was and what he did. It’s not an accident that he came and left humbly and vulnerably. As a gospel minister I will resist all forms of power that invoke the name of Jesus while acting contrary to his very essence. The Bible is clear that we are made strong in our weakness. Weak or meek vessels are the only vessels that can cooperate with and be filled by the supernatural power of God. There’s a lot of pressure to be a strong woman, but there was nothing wrong with our innate vulnerabilities in the first place. God can use those over and above the strength of men.

Earthly Dominions Contradict Christ’s Power

Every time Christianity is combined with government power it is a disaster for Christianity. When Constantine did this it was called Christendom. It probably looked like a great idea to make an empire Christian, but government power and Christianity are like oil and water. They cannot go together. They do not make sense together. If you put them together, you lose the essence of Christ and his kingdom entirely. You have grown something in the name of Jesus, but you have not allowed the Spirit to grow the Church, which happens through conditions of desperation, persecution, and clinging to Christ in our broken world.

A lot of Christians are afraid of what students like you will learn in university to undo the Christianity we have tried to put inside of you. I know God is bigger than that. I just want to make sure that when you learn these truths about Christianity getting mixed in with power, you do not miss Christ. Christ is there on campus. He loves you and the students there. He invites you to something life-giving, freeing, and true.

He will find you.

*A letter to my daughter coming of age in our culture wars. Written in early 2025 during her freshman year.